Ok so I have two storefronts, I really don't need double the emails from the forum and such. So, when I click the link at the bottom of an email notification, it brings me to my administration page, ok so I click on the forum, and then what? What am I missing?  
Also how do I update my address book. Am I that old that if it's not obvious I can't figure it out technology?

Try this:
 
Log in as your 2nd store.  
Go to the forum.
Click Notifications.
Make your choices.
 
It worked for my 2nd store.

Yes I can see how double the notifications is not necessarily double the fun. I will look into this.
 
Re: sales notification emails, that is something entirely different.  I'm not aware of a setting to opt out or consolidate these.  If you're getting a lot, that's good news!  A work around could be creating a e-mail rule in your email to re-route them from your inbox directly to a specific folder.  (ie: via title)  
 
Hope this helps and I'll report back on the Forum notifications.